A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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If I tell you that seeing you happy, is my main motivation towards accepting right now, would you believe me?

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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Where can I apply for janitor school?

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

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Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

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A blind man walks into a bar----b wire

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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Q: Why do police men keep killing unarmed black men? A: I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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