What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

what do u call a apple a apple

sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

A paraplegic walks into a bar.

SUCK MY NUTS

i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

hear hear

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

what do you call a toddler with a gun? uninteresting

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

Why did the man dig his nose? because everyone digs their nose

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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