There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Obama 2012

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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69.9

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Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops