What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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u smell oh no of wat?? dunno i just know its BADDDDDDD !!!!!! k.c

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

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what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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hi

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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