What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops