There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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umm idk what joke to write down so yea and so rate this a thumbs up! okay bc this is an awesome joke...right right right yea ik!

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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