A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I violate everyone that do not thumb me green, and vi0late the children, the parents, and the person of those that thumb me red... Its not about the sex, its about the domination... You might even like it...Your kids? Not so much... Well sometimes... Green thumb me, and I will... Meh, then you are awesome... friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Subscribe below, address tracker activated... LETS GO!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is funny about family guy?the jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the guy say when he found out his girlfriend had a dick I don't think we should date anymore, you have a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Where would you be unlikely to find a polar bear? In a courtroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

thumb_up thumb_down +10

woman..parallel parking

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why do canadians have a lower violent crime rate than the U.S? Because they were all raped as children and are now afraid of getting raped again when bathing in prision.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

heads up!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There were two ducks in a bathtub. One duck says to the other, "Pass me the soap" The other duck replies, "What do i look like, a toaster?"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops