how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

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Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

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Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

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Baman: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? Piderman: What? Baman: They're all gone!

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A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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a black guy walks into a bar and the bartender says "get out of here, whites only" this joke takes place in the 1950's when african americans were discriminated against

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

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Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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