A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

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getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

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whoever said we're all soft on the inside was probably not an experienced doctor.

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

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What did the man with the gun say to the man without the gun? I have a gun

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Knock, Knock Who's there It's me open up the D#### door it's me open up the D#### door, who? just open the door this is not a fricken knock knock joke.

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How old are you? 20

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what's brown and sticky A stick!

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Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

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Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

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Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

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what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he's a pussy.

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What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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