A baby seal walks into a club.

Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

meatspin.fr

Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

Why couldn't the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

GADZOOKS!

A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

Z.

Women's rights.

What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

What's the capital of Ohio? O

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

What does an unemployed black man and a mexican have in common? They both like to shop at forman mills because they have reasonably priced clothing items.

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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