Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because seven "eight" nine. Yeah, I went there.

what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

Women's rights

Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

Whats Yellow And Cant Swim A Bulldozer.

Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

Cancer

What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

Whoever said "don't start what you can't finish" hopefully didn't think about having kids Cuz that would be horror Get it?

Do you like fish-sticks? Love 'em. You like putting fish-sticks in your mouth? Yeah. What are you, a gay fish?

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

Three men walk into a bar. Start drinking, fight each other and sustain massive head injuries.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

Why couldn't the little girl swing? She didn't have any limbs.

Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

Knock Knock. Who's There? Billy. Oh, come on in. You could have just knocked on my door or rang doorbell without saying "Knock Knock" though, that's kind of childish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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