whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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