Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

what do you call a cow? A cow

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...