Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

5

whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

69

What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

What did the nazi say to the jew? im gay

Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

What has sand and an ocean? A picture of a beach.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

Women's rights.

A black man trips and falls down. You help him up and ask him if he needs any help. After a brief friendly talk you both continue on your separate ways.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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