What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

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"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

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knock! knock! whos there? doctor doctor who? no Doctor Brown, you have cancer

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Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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Do you know the Muffin Man? Of course you don't, faggot.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

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Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

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What's the difference between dogs and humans? 8.

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

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What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

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Terrorist walked into the bar, all dead, except for a small child. The police came and asked the boy: "Boy, how I survived the blast?" The boy answered: "I'm not a boy, I am broccoli"

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What's Brown and Sticky? A stick.

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What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

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How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

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A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

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Q: What did the peanut say to the shell? A: Its dark in here.

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What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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