Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

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A duck waddles into a bar. He orders a drink and promtly drinks it vecause he has had a hard day at work.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

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Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

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What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

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why did the baby start crying? someone threw a brick at it

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what do you call a group of people who are systematiclly ruining a once well run family football club? steve kean , the venkys, and there advisors

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

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1+1 =? Too

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

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Scientology.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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What did the clock say? The time.

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What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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