There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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What's green, fuzzy, and would likely cause fatal harm if it were to fall on someone? A pool table.

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Small breasts.

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>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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I got shot, you laughed

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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look at there!! an entire dog!!

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What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

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Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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Hello

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DANA

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How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

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What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

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What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Jews for Jesus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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