What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

what is white and sticky? glue.

Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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