A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

Call of Duty is a good game.

Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

gingers

Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

Kade was sad. He had finally got a girlfriend when he realized he actually liked men.

why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

How do you confuse a chicken? Paint yourself black and throw seeds at it.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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