What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black and doesn't work? Half of Detroit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops