"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

What's Green and invisible? This cabbage --------------------------->>>>>

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

A man had two horses. One was black and one was white. He cut the tail of one of them to tell them apart.

If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

Tyler: Why'd the monkey fall out of a tree? Donnie: who's there Tyler: dude this isn't a knock knock joke...

Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

Everyone always gets up in arms over human trafficking... ... Well I kind of enjoy the convenience of air travel and so on.

Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

Whats the square root of pie? Pies are round.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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