Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

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Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

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Caitlyn.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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penis

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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make me a sandwich!

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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