What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

A homeless man comes home from work.

roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

4 is half the number 8 is.

A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

Why Does God Hate Gays? He Doesent, God Does Not Exist.

Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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