I have a crush on my dad.

Knock Knock Who's there? ... No one, you have Schizophrenia

What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

so a dyslexic man sold his soul to Santa

Q. how did the blond get a college degree in medicine? A. she studied hard and aced her final exam.

What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

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That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

What are little Timmy's hopes and dreams? Destroyed.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

Q: What is, in full, Donald Trump's speech to the Republican National Convention? A: This. I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! Trump tromp troomp trimp treemp tramp trump trump trump!

Roses are red, violets are blue, your so ugly, im going to kill you! Just kidding.......... Violets are purple. -Harrison

what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

This is a joke

I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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