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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

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how do you make a baby cry kick it off a cliff

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, because feminists can't change anything

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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What happened to the man who just took a shit? He got a stunning pain in his anus because the earlier Hemorrhoid issues had now turned in to a open wound around his Anoderm.

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Unnnnnnnn

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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(kid is eating a round fruit) friend: Get me an apple too. Kid: I wish I could The kids friend later realizes that his friend was actually eating a peach.

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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School

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Why was Adolf Hitler such a bad man? Because he never kissed his wife goodbye.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

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What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

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Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

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What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your so ugly, im going to kill you! Just kidding.......... Violets are purple. -Harrison

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Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops