What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? ones delicious and the other is a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down -79

a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

thumb_up thumb_down +68

why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

A person walks into a store. He goes to a worker an asks "were is the potatos?" . The worker says, there on that shelf.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What's sad about 3 Black Guys in a Camero? It was my car...

thumb_up thumb_down +52

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A mute says to a paraplegic: You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

thumb_up thumb_down +42

why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Nah

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

thumb_up thumb_down +36

yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +36

what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops