Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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Your big dick.

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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