why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

Why did the fireman die? For various reasons,one was because he was burnt alive.

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

Why Didn't LeBron James go to College? He was really good and decided to go to the NBA straight out of High School.

Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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