How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

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life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

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Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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What is your view on school violence? I'm all for it.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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What's the difference between a banana and a monkey? They're both yellow, except the monkey

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

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When did Osama Bin Laden die? Nobody gives a @!?$

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justin bieber is a good singer april fools haha you thought hell had frozen over

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck on the way.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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Why did princess diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Kindly ask him to come down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops