minorities

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

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What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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Of course, first door on your left

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

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What do you call a Jew A Jew

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-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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