Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

Buzi vagy!

How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

-Look! Up in the sky! -It's a bird! -Yep.

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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