Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

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Agent 47.

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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How did th-A fridge.

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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