Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

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Jake Bowar

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Why? Because!

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

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What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

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Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

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Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

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1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops