What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

French people

What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

A Jew doesn't walk out of the Holocaust.

What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

Women Voting

why did the boy dress up like a girl? because he has autism.

What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

who eats pencils asians

Sex. That is all.

What's worse than dropping your phone in the toilet? Drinking only milk and honey for 7 days and then getting diarrhea while lying chained up completely naked with red fire ants going up your anus and all over your body while you get eaten alive in slow painfully miserable death

Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

you will die someday

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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