why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

what's funnier than hell? heaven

GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

Kittens.

Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

Bin Laden is dead.

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

boobs

hi

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

ROSS G IS OBESE

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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