What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? They threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

knock knock your gay

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what time is it rape time

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops