one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

wuts at the end of the world? nothing the earth is spherical and therefore does not have an end

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what happened to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? The list goes on.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a muslim walks in to a bar... there were no survivors

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A moth walks into a podiatrist's office, the podiatrist rubs his eyes and looks again and realizes it was just a man taking off his coat in a grandeur fashion.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

So anyways, can I have the last comment or not?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Hello I'm a fat kid

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -28

My mom's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -30

who farted? umm........that guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops