You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

Q: What does Osama Bin Laden's dead body and a sea sponge have in common? A: Nothing. One was buried in respectful accordance with Islamic law and the other is an animal of the phylum Porifera that's incapable of murdering thousands of innocent persons.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

Q: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Nothing, they never met! :)

what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair

A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

I jacked off over a blind girl the other day, she never saw me coming

whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

whats better than sex? cookies

what did the goat say to the shepherd? goats can't talk.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

friends are like potatoes. if you eat them, they die.

what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

Why was the alpaca sad He just got raped

Knock knock. Who's there? To get the other side!

What did the blind, deaf, mute child get for Christmas? Leukemia

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

Feet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...