Turtles

What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

Dear John,

What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

lololololololololol

Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

CHEEZECAKE

What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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