What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...