A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A Black Guy, A Rabbi, And A Mexican walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says "Get Outta Here We're Closed!"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

thumb_up thumb_down -34

what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

thumb_up thumb_down -34

a blind man walks into a wall

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

thumb_up thumb_down -34

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -34

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

your so fat. your fat!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops