Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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women's rights

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

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how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

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What comes after "Q" R

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

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Want to hear an anti-joke?

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How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

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How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

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What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

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Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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