What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

Look at your hand. Made you look!

DERP

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

American healthcare.

how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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