Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

Q: What did the hobo get for Christmas? A: Hypothermia.

So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Two Jews walk in a bar...

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

Your mama so stupid, she put 2 quarters in her ears and said she was istening to Fiftycent

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

How did the mecanic die? He drowned

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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