Hitler. lol, sucks.

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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black

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Yo Mamma

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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