Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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(insert antijoke here

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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You.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

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Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

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Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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I got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen.

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-Is Michael Jackson dead? - HELL YEAH HE'S DEAD!!

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is different and the other between.

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A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

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go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

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3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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