knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

thumb_up thumb_down +90

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

boobs

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

thumb_up thumb_down -50

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

thumb_up thumb_down -150

Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +117

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

thumb_up thumb_down +39

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

thumb_up thumb_down -131

Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

thumb_up thumb_down -139

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops