A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

thumb_up thumb_down -100

roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

thumb_up thumb_down -206

?"what's up" "A preposition"

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +226

A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops