Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

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Grapefruit.

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how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty one year olds? The orgasm.

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

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The glass is half an hour.

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Guess what? Chicken butt? Poultry gluteus maximus!

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R.I.P Ryan Dunn.

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What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? Because they were part of his uniform.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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Knock Knock Come in

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What do you say to a blind buss driver? You suck

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I love you Itachi Uchiha, please let me lick ice cream off of your body and oh crap you're an anime character and not real never mind

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

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What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

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Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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