what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

thumb_up thumb_down +33

how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

thumb_up thumb_down +31

So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

thumb_up thumb_down +31

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +29

For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock. Go away!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Pianca going ham

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Simon Cowell's hair is real.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

4 out of 5 Americans make up 80% of Americans

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops